Turkey Jokes

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
The tur-KEY.

Why do turkeys go "gobble, gobble"? .
Because they haven't learned good table manners.

What do turkeys like to eat on Thanksgiving?
Nothing, they're already stuffed.

Why did the turkey eat his meal so quickly?
Because he was a gobbler.

How do you make a turkey float?
Get two scoops of ice cream, add some rootbeer and a turkey.

Why did the turkey join a band?
He had the drumsticks.

Why couldn't the turkey go to church?
He used "fowl" language!

What did the little turkey say to the big turkey ?
"Peck" on someone your own size!

What do turkeys use to clean themselves ?
They use "feather dusters"!

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off !

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all.

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play.

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Arthur.
Arthur who?
Arthur any leftovers?

For Krista, Jared and Tommy

The other night, as we were Thanksgiving shopping, I ran into one of my all-time favorite people: Krista. Well, as an added bonus, her hubby, Jared, was with her.




We chatted for a while, and then she gave Tyler money to buy Pringles. LOL!



Krista & Jared, you are all I have heard about since!

Tyler: " I love Krista. She is so pretty."
Tyler: "Jared is so cool. I love the way he talks. I want to talk like that when I get big."
Tyler to everyone he meets: "G'day mate!" or "Hello Mate!"
Tyler eating Pringles: "I love Krista. She is so nice!"

So, to Krista and Jared, Tyler adores you. Jared, he wants to be like you. Krista, he loves you. Krista, YOU are beautiful. You look incredible and deserve all your happiness!

This post is to Krista, Jared and Tommy. Tommy is my bro. Tommy acts so much younger than his 27 years. (In a good way.) That could be in part because he is dating a younger girl. This works for several reasons:

1. She is hip to what is happening in the world.
2. She picks out cool Christmas presents. lol
3. She still believes the world is good.
4. She keeps my brother happy.

Ok, stop right there. Reread #4. She keeps my brother happy. That's the most important one. Who is this mystery girl? Her name is Natalia. Natalia is cute, sweet, kind, generous, and just a 'lil bit naughty. In the good way, like telling funny jokes and not being offended by mine. Natalia rides horses and is dang good at it.

Natalia and her horse, Hail. Hail is from New Zealand. Cool huh?

Tommy, thank you for teaching me to use predictive text. It saves so much time. You CAN teach an old dog new tricks! Hey, Mom, wanna learn to text?

JUST KIDDING!

Tommy and Mom...